Dear Ella: How do I stop making my expertise sound like a suggestion?
Dear Ella,
I have a bad habit. I make a recommendation, then immediately dress it up as a possibility.
“One thought might be…”
“Maybe we could consider…”
“I wonder if…”
Meanwhile, I have done the work. I know the issue. I have a point of view. But by the time I finish softening it, my judgment sounds like it wandered in from another meeting.
Then someone else says, “We should do this,” and suddenly we have leadership.
How do I stay open without making my expertise sound optional?
Signed, Just Putting It Out There
Dear Out There,
Please stop placing your judgment on the conference table like an unattended casserole.
You are making the room assemble your recommendation from clues.
Why are you presenting a conclusion as though the room needs to discover it with you?
You are a senior leader, not a community bulletin board.
This is Influence work: stating a clear point of view so others can engage, challenge, or adopt it, without diluting it.
Try this: Lead with the recommendation.
“My recommendation is that we delay the launch by two weeks.”
Then give the reason.
“The operational risk is higher than the benefit of keeping the current date.”
Then invite discussion.
“I want to test that against anything I may be missing.”
Now you have stated your judgment, shown your reasoning, and left room for discussion
Your expertise can be open to challenge and still arrive as expertise.
Ella’s Last Word: If you present your judgment as a suggestion, do not be surprised when the room moves it to the parking lot.
Explore Ellevae: If you are ready to strengthen your authority without becoming louder, harder, or less yourself, start with the Influence Path.
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